why now am i feeling all the pressure?
pressure of acceptance in the teenage golongan.
pressuer of studies
pressure of just being a teenager.
why now am i handling all this alone?
what wrong did i do in life?
why is it whenever i do feel down and lonely i am always alone to be sharing this heartbreak.
i couldnt feel any love even from my family.
im glad and will always be thankful for my closest friends. but still there will never be happiness for me
im sick and tired of this shit.
im sick and tired of being left out alone in this world.
i just want to end all this shit.
i have been crying for the umpteenth time for the past few days.
whenever i think about it. tears will just start rolling down my eyes and to my cheeks.
i tried covering it with a dap of blusher and foundation and pretend that it will all be okay.
but i guess i was wrong
people seem to be liking you but then when you turn your back towards them. bithcyness comes out. the most biggest gossip about you can just happen in a minute.
it sucks the way it already is. why must the hurt be even deeper than before?
is this a test from GOD. to see how i am able to cope woth life. well finally i have given all of it up. i just wouldnt care less about everything. i will just go through my days with the most fake smile i could ever show. and pretending.
im just fed up. fed up with everything.
shut up and just go!


life has just been unfair to me this week. i swear im hating it..
fuck it! my dad took away my phone and i have no more connection to the outside world. my only resource would be the computer and the house phone. been depressed since yesterday. i've cried too many times till i cant even count anymore. whenever i turn left, right, front or back i see phones everywhere. gosh!
and school is starting to suck. fuck it!
been mugging my ass off every night. i just want N's to finish as soon as possible.
why must we even take it. what's the point.
have been having tons and tons of test, essays and readings. i think my brain can like explode any minute now.
hahaha. i just love taking pictures while studying. some camwhoring.
i think famfam has really gotten herself berserk. she's gettin crazier and crazier every minute. i cant stand her! she's making me stress just looking at her.
and the freaking computer is just super slow. why? why? why? must this happen to me.
i want my phone back so i can get my life back. hahahah. i sound like some retard but i really do miss me. :(